Niceness Counts

~ Liquid Sunshine ~by ViaMoi

I was reading a kindness newsletter from Help.Others.org earlier.  It reminds again of the importance of kindness.  It’s amazing how making someone else feel better makes you feel better too.

There are lots of ways to be kind. You can give a compliment, bake brownies, or offer to help with a task someone else struggles with.  You can do a chore for a friend or give a stranger a gift.  Hand out flowers, share a hug, or simply listen to someone who needs it.

A simple smile and hello go a long, long way. Just today there were some people at work who were sick.  They were tired, withdrawn and quiet because they didn’t feel good.  Just smiling at them and joking around lifted their moods for a while.  It couldn’t make the pain go away, but it helped them forget about it for a moment.

Niceness counts too.  Especially at work, where it is sometimes unexpected. Saying good morning, acknowledging help with a thank you, or giving praise for a good job, all increase positive feelings.  Sharing a smile, good news, and funny stories are all helpful to building good relationships at work.

Niceness is wonderful at home too.  Have you ever known someone who didn’t want to hear how much you love them? A kiss or hug when you walk in the door is welcoming.  Turning off the TV or muting the volume while you listen to your spouse shows them you care about them and how they feel.

Kindness and the power of being nice make the day so much more smoother and happier, it’s a wonder I don’t do it every day. On a really good day I can even make someone I don’t like happy.  On a bad day, helping a friend smile or feel cared for makes me feel needed, which gives me a reason to keep going.

So why don’t I always wear my rose-colored glasses?  I don’t know. Life gets in the way.  I get “busy.”  That terrible 4-letter word that means I stop paying attention to myself and those around me, and miss golden opportunities to make life better. But that’s why I’m sharing.  Today just reading about the kindness of strangers made me feel more optimistic.  Then I listened to a friend and gave out some smiles and compliments.  Soon my mood was much improved.  It was a subtle reminder of the power of kindness.  Niceness adds a bit more beauty and joy into the world.  And we could all use more of that.

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The Magic of Laughter.

by Bill Gracey

Today is Global Belly Laugh Day. At 1:24 p.m. on January 24th (1/24) you can stop and have a good deep belly laugh.  Laughing is good for you.  It lightens even the most solemn moods and can even help lower your blood pressure.

With today’s pressures, many of us find it hard to have the lighthearted spirit needed for a really deep belly laugh.  You know, the kind that has you gasping for air and clutching your stomach as you loud ha-ha-ha’s fill the room – or even the entire house.

Make the decision to find time for laughter.  That’s why silly holidays like these can be so important.  Today I was not feeling like laughing, especially at work.  But I saw this holiday listed on my calendar and checked out the web site. As I scrolled down and saw the video for “Can’t stop laughing” I stopped and watched it.

When the best man lost his pants at the wedding, I couldn’t help but giggle.  When the groom continued snickering, I began to laugh a little more, but when the groom, his bride and the crowd all started chuckling, I couldn’t help but laugh out loud. Of course I shared the video with my coworkers and we all started laughing.  One giggle led to another, and then another, and soon we were all having a great time.  This is the magic of laughter.

If you make time to visit funny web sites, read humorous emails, watch sitcoms, or any other activity that strikes your funny bone, you’ll feel better. It will invigorate your mind and body.  Suddenly you don’t feel quite so tired anymore.

One of my favorite activities is watching children.  It can be in the grocery store, at home, or even on TV.  Ever see a child in a shopping cart making faces at people as their mother shops? Or a 5 year old making clucking sounds to the delight of his baby sister?  Children are full of the enthusiasm that laughter brings.

Here are a few ideas:

• Read the funnies – newspapers comics are still a great source of laughter
• Play with a puppy
• Read a great bit of Giggle Poetry
• Smile at everyone you see
• People watch at your local mall – guaranteed to find you something funny
• Visit You Tube
• Have a Tickle Fight
• Have a Laughter Yoga session and “fake it until you make it”

Have a great Global Belly Laugh day, and discover the magic of laughter for yourself.

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Word of the Year – Freedom.

Picture by thatbluepuppy

I’ve heard several blogs talking about picking a word of the year for your New Year’s resolution. I really like the idea, but last year I just couldn’t narrow down my choice to one.  This year I’ve got it – my word is FREEDOM.

Freedom to make mistakes.  Freedom to change my mind.  Freedom to be silly.  Freedom to do what I want to do. I tend to get way too caught up in doing what I “should” do.  Going to work, paying my bills, cooking, cleaning, and all that stuff.  Which is fine in it’s own way, but I spend more time on what I HAVE to do, instead of what I WANT to do.

I’m giving myself PERMISSION to have the freedom in my life that I envy in the lives of others.  The freedom to CHOOSE to make time for the things I’m missing out on.  Going on more trips, eating at new restaurants, learning new ways of making money so I can afford the things I want.

Freedom is allowing me to stop complaining about my life.  I’m free to find a new job that is more align with my passion.  I’m free to try dressing in a new way and even overhaul my whole wardrobe if I want to.  Lately I’ve been trying many new foods and finding that my taste buds have changed and I enjoy flavors I didn’t before.  Freedom allows me to say, “I’m different today than I was yesterday – and that’s WONDERFUL!”

My own inner critic was holding me back far more than any real-life criticism I received.  If a person told me I couldn’t do it, I’d just say – “Yeah right –watch me!.”  If I told myself I couldn’t do it, I was convinced that I was a smart person and I must know what I was talking about!  By focusing on FREEDOM, I know that I’m free to change my mind, try again, or completely revise my old ideas. This focus word is helping me put things into perspective.

So what is your word for the year?  And how does it help you?  Share your ideas with me.

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Express Your Silly Self.

Tattoo Clown Man In Funny Glasses
Originally uploaded by Pink Sherbet Photography

I often fear letting people see the inner me. There are so many critics out there – -and I already have plenty in my own head.  I find I have many fears; looking stupid, making a mistake that could cost me – money, friendship, or an opportunity, or missing out on something better.

 

Recently I started drawing again.  For me that basically means copying other people’s ideas.  I have very little drawing skill yet, and I’ve done no formal training, but I love cartoons and always wanted to draw my own.  I also loving coloring just for the sake of coloring.  The colors, the rhythm of crayons or colored pencils across the paper is relaxing to me.

 

I find showing people my drawings fairly embarrassing.  While I might know that I’ve already progressed bit by bit into cleaner lines, others may see my attempts as immature and weak.  I know that each day I draw I get better, but when the comments begin “What exactly is that supposed to be?” I do get a bit flushed in the face.

 

I also like to sing and dance although I’m not very good at either.  But since I’ve been practicing letting go of my fears I’ve found that with practice those get better too.  Not that I can leave my day job in this lifetime, but at least my voice stays in tune a little better and I only fall on my butt once instead of three times.

 

Honestly, I wish they taught us these things in school.  Like, it’s okay to make mistakes – it means you’re learning. And you can’t be great at something if you’ve never done it before.  It takes practice, that’s all.  And why not teach us that being different is not only okay, but possibly necessary for our sanity.

 

Just like different have different tastes – my husband loves pumpkin pie while I prefer cherry for instance, we all have different ways of expressing ourselves. I love to read books, meditate and watch cartoons.  Friends of mine often haven’t picked up a book in years and find cartoons childish.  That’s fine, I’m not a big fan of shopping and I don’t like math.  To each their own.

 

All I know is when I do all those wacky, strange, crazy things I love, it makes me smile. The smile often turns into laughter.  After a few minutes, I find I feel more energized and peaceful.  These activities entertain me and break up boredom, frustration and put me in a better mood.  You can’t ask for better than that.

 

So next time somebody asks you why you’re being so silly, just tell them “That’s me, that’s just how I roll.”  Enjoying your passions and having as much as you can fit in your day are the best ways I know to have a satisfying life. Being yourself is totally worth it.

 

Here’s a few more things I love; rock collecting (crystals and fossils), ghosts and the paranormal, movie nights, visiting the library, going to the flea market, dogs, kids playing, walking in the woods and surfing the Internet.  What DO YOU LOVE?

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When in Doubt, Do It Anyway.

Picture by revoluzzza

The fear monster is very scary. It can be overwhelming loud and insistent.  That nagging voice that says “You can’t dance.  You don’t know how to paint.  You’ll never be able to write an entire novel.”

We all doubt our abilities and talents.  We fear we don’t have enough time, determination or knowledge to accomplish our dreams.  When in doubt – do it anyway.

Our fears will always be there.  Usually they never amount to anything.  I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve hesitated to do something new because I might look foolish.  Often, I did look silly, uncoordinated or clumsy.

It’s okay to look like a fool sometimes.  It means we’re growing and learning. I took a writing course since I love books and stories and I’ve always wanted to create some of my own.  I never did any more writing after that course.  It overwhelmed with the big bad world of publishing.

I learned publishing was too intense for me right now.  But I did learn others things; punctuation, sentence structure, and other useful tips that I can use in anything I write.  I learned that I may need to tweak that dream a little to make workable for me. So even though I see the course as a failure, I did learn.

I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.
Thomas A. Edison

 

A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new.
Albert Einstein

We’re always going to stumble and falter when we try something new.  We’ll feel uncertain and nervous, ungraceful and fumbling.  But our investigations will teach us, sometimes leading us in new, exciting directions.  It’s an adventure worth having.  So if you’re in doubt – go ahead and do it anyway.

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Gratitude Day.

By jurvetson

Today is Gratitude Day. I’ve always loved writing down things I’m grateful for and then looking back at the happy memories later. It also helps you focus on the positive things in your life when things aren’t so grand.  Taking a moment to reflect on the good things in life helps make me a happier person.  Here are a few good things from this weekend and today:

Weekend:

I took a 3 day long weekend and was off yesterday.  I’m grateful for all the rest I got (up to 12 hours of sleep in one night!)  And I’m glad to have a shorter work week as a result.  I’m grateful for the sunny days I enjoyed and for the quiet and peacefulness of the mountains which I love so much.  I enjoyed finding the one apple on the new apple tree – it was really yummy.  I’m grateful for neighbors that let us eat some of the pears on their tree – double yummy.  Plus we made homemade blizzards this weekend that were just as good as Dairy Queen.  (Enjoy those summer perks while you still can.)

A list of things I’m grateful for today:

• That I work indoors out of the heat.
• That I have a job where I work at my own pace.
• I’m glad I remember to get my stuff ready the night before so I don’t have to rush in the morning.  ( I like having time to wake-up before work.)
• I’m glad I’ve updated my book list this week so I know which books to get from the library.  (I’m a big book lover so having a list of what you need in each series is essential!)
• I’m happy to have accomplished a bunch of to-do items this weekend.
• I’m super-excited that tomorrow is the start of fall.  Summer’s great, but I love that cool, crisp fall air, the changing leaves and drinking hot cocoa when it’s chilly.
• I’m glad I’m learning to practice relaxing more and not letting problems affect how I feel.  (Though I have to practice this one a lot.)
• I’m grateful my dog in is good health even though she’s 14 years old.
• I’m glad I get to listen to a variety of music every day.  With my MP3 player and satellite TV I can be as eclectic as I want.
• And so on. . .

And yes, much of this stuff are things I was grateful for before.  But isn’t it nice when you can just sit down and think for a few minutes and come up with a list of things to be happy about?  It definitely improves my mood and perspective. Plus there’s always a few things you forgot about or didn’t mention that you think of later.  That’s like bonus happiness points.  Gratitude Day reminds us that we really do have a lot to be happy about, if only we sit down and take a minute to appreciate it.

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Live By Your Own Rules.

by Prozac74

While reading another blog that I love, I came across a theme that really resonates with me. It’s called “Rules that don’t exist.” I love this idea firstly because I have always been a bit weird.  I often enjoy things that friends or family dislike or aren’t interested in.  It could be liking music someone else hates, or my love reading – I can’t get enough of it.  Some friends hope that particular disease isn’t contagious

That’s why living by your own rules is so important. Another great blogger, Gretchen Rubin, talks about how what’s fun for other people may not be fun for you – and vice versa.  This is so important to recognize.  You can’t live your life by other people’s rules.

If you love foreign films, or playing video games, or doing sudoku, go right ahead and have fun!  If you love knitting, making homemade Christmas cards or fantasy football – go for it!  Do what YOU love.  Remember love is a matter of the heart. Just like no one can make you love a particular person, no one can make you love a particular thing either.

If you’re anything like me, you live the old adage “Joys shared are doubled, sorrows shared are halved.”  For me, it’s completely true.  Sometimes I feel my joy is diminished because the people around me don’t share my enthusiasm and interest.

It is an enormous relief to realize that while none of my friends like playing with toys – I love it!  I like movies that my husband hates.  It’s like a milkshake – some love strawberry or vanilla, but I love chocolate.  Living life by your own rules means enjoying your particular flavor of life.

That’s one of the beautiful things about the Internet.  There you can find comrades who enjoy EXACTLY the same things as you.  Even if you have to go to one site for Harry Potter fans, and another one for horror movie fans.  (Both of which I like.)

I was reading an article with a point of view I disagreed with today, and it made me feel guilty.  (I thought the article had a point.)  But then I realized, that even though I agree with some of the information, I didn’t agree with the main point.  And that’s TOTALLY OK.  My whole perspective shifted once I realized it’s okay to disagree.

So whatever rules you use to live your life, make them ones that work for you.  Look at the things that you think you should believe – that doing things for others is good for you, that you can’t stay out late on a work night, or that rollercoasters are fun.  Maybe so, but maybe that’s not true for you.  Create a life that makes sense for you, not someone else, even someone you admire. Go live life by YOUR RULES!

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